L’Oreal Wangst: Eldar Outcast

L'Oreal Wangst

L’Oreal Wangst

“My space elf has no nose.”

“How does he smell?”

“Like a healthy, affluent woman after a week long spa treatment.”


L’Oreal is a miscast “Ieuan” miniature, the only miscast that I have ever got from Hasslefree Miniatures that I can remember.  The figure is missing its nose and a bit of its fringe, plus the right cheek and mouth are both uneven, due to the mould not quite filling in that area.  I spotted this issue when I cleaned the model up for painting a few years ago and had planned to do some sort of repair work to it.  Which I subsequently completely forgot about.


This week I thought about using this figure as an addition to Ramirez Sensei band, so I sprayed it and started painting yesterday… at which point I re-spotted the damage.  Having already sat down to paint, I decided to turn the uneven bits into an additional elements of the weird symbiotic/parasitic weapon and to simply paint the figure as if his nose had been severed at some point.  It works reasonably well, although something about the models peculiar mouth and nose reminds me of Michael Jackson.


I have numerous painted space elf models of various persuasions and vintages, so I was never quite sure why I bought this model: it was surplus to requirements in many ways.  Reading the Sensei Adventure Band Table in the Realm of Chaos: The Lost and the Damned book as part of the research for painting Sensei Ramirez brought this particular figure to mind though.

"Nobody understands me"

“Nobody understands me”

The result on the chart reads:

“The Band is joined by a Lone Eldar who has left his Craftworld to undertake some personal quest.  The Eldar will not speak of his motives nor of his life before he joined the Sensei”

"I TOLD you to avoid talking about the icky arm thing...

“I TOLD you not to talk about the arm…”

So although all Eldar have “issues”, it appears that the sort of Eldar who walk the Path of the Outcast and join up with a Sensei are likely to have even more than most.  I figure that fusing his body with a Cronenberg-esque alien weapon that makes his nose fall off qualifies L’Oreal admirably for this role.  I also understand why he might be reluctant to talk about it.


I painted L’Oreal as an individual, rather than as part of a theme running through one of my skirmish forces.  I used a similar scheme to that used on my Zegema Beach Zephyrs DreadBall team.  I like the somewhat anime meets TRON look that I think it gives.  Its a pretty stark contrast with the refurbished fantasy figure look that Ramirez has, but that dissimilarity is desirable in many ways too.

"Sport, eugh.  Sport is for conformists"

“Sport?  SPORT?!  Sport is for conformists”

I painted the model pretty quickly and its a bit scruffier than usual in places.  Its good enough though and the figure is eye-catching and angsty, which I find entertaining.  I suspect that the many tedious tales Ramirez tells about his thousands of years of existence grate horribly on poor old L’Oreal, resulting in a Zap Brannigan/Kif or Kirk/Spock type of dynamic.

"Yes.  Yes you have told me about the time that you had to disguise yourself as a Japanese groom. Many times"

“Yes. Yes you have told me about the time that you had to disguise yourself as a Japanese groom. Many times”


23 Responses

  1. Well that was smooth, tying in the damaged figure with the the alien arm weapon. That’s what he gets for sticking his nose in to dangerous Xenos technologies ;). I quite like the fact that he looks very different from the other spaaace elves, works well in this retinue context.


    • Yeah, the missing nose workaround worked better than it had any right to really 🙂 I agree regarding the attire too: its preferable that he looks like his own elf, so to speak.

      I have a rather vainglorious looking well equipped human miniature in a similar state of unholy congress with xenotech. I was thinking of theming that guy as possibly having something to do with the Eldars current state, making the human into L’Oreals “One-Armed Man“, if you know what I mean. It would be a fun sub-plot to add to games I think.


  2. Brilliant ! Man that Elf has a scary weapon (I can totally see the Cronenberg filiation). I also like the Zapp Brannigan/Kiff sort of relation he and Ramirez have; it toes very well with the sort of “I-have-problems I-can’t-talk-about” attitude I imagine L’Oréal to have.

    Some very good models we’ll have on the table !


    • Thanks Asslessman!

      The weapon is what had put me off painting that figure before now actually, as it didnt really fit with what I was using my Eldar miniatures for. But it works rather well in this context I think.

      I have a few more miniatures that fit in with the Sensei band concept lined up already, so I may end up with more than I the number that I require for the event at BOYL. Have more painted miniatures than required is rarely a problem though 🙂


  3. Wow, you have gone one step beyond this time! You have managed the issue with total mastership, the guy looks great; as a matter of fact he has much more charm now, you might have improved the original! I wasn’t aware of the cocaine abuse problem among Eldar :P, so thank you for not hiding the issue and bringing it into the public light 😀


    • Heh, I think that a bit of substance abuse might be understandable in L’Oreals case. He does have that… thing… pulsating and excreting on his arm after all. He is living a Naked Lunch type existence even before he gets stuck into the Charlie 😉

      Thanks for the feedback Suber.


  4. I always thought this model had a cool look to it, if a little stiff. I really like what you did with it! It came out looking top-notch, “scruffy” as it may be in your eyes.


    • The pose is a little stiff. That combined with the weapon that is conceptually incongruous with my other Eldar meant that this model didnt get to the top of the queue until now. Its a nice model to paint though.

      Tackling the miscast face with paint was a less precise process that I would have liked. That combined with shading it with a purple led the skin tones that are not as smooth as I would like, which is where the scruffiness comes in. I rushed a bit towards the end of the process too, just to get it finished. Until I have some time away from it, those blemishes will likely be all that I can see. You know how it is Im sure 🙂

      Thanks for the feedback!


  5. An emo space elf (is there another kind?) that looks like Michael Jackson and is named L’Oreal? Paul, you’re starting to become a personal hero 😀


    • Thanks Mikko. The floppy fringe was crying out for that sort of name and colour treatment, but the Michael Jackson thing just happened as part of the miscast damage control.

      This guy has put me in the mood to paint some more space elves actually, even though I have shedloads painted already.


  6. Simply brilliant.

    That you could turn a miscast into a characterful member of your band says a lot about your ingenuity and skill. Congratulations!


    • Thanks very much wachinayn. The miscast elements were quite easy to get to fit in overall. The mouth was easily the hardest bit and, well, that ended up looking like Michael Jacksons mouth… not exactly perfect ;D

      Thanks for the feedback!


  7. Stellar work mate, I find it hard to accept that you finished him within a day. Git! =)

    Also, Ramirez was a stroke of genius. Very well painted. You’re posting too much for me to keep up with! Keep it up! =D


    • Thanks Mattias. Basing and varnishing stretched the time taken to finish the model out a bit, but all of the painting was done within a day (alongside base coating a handful of other miniatures while washes and things were drying). It wasnt a full day either, I had to do a number of other things that kept taking me away from the painting table.

      Having looked at you description of how you painted Skroob and co, I use fewer steps when painting than you do, which saves me some time I guess, while compromising quality a bit.

      Ramirez took a bit longer than a day I suspect, but he was painted in the evening on and off over a week, so I cant be that sure.

      Thanks for the feedback!


  8. Oh, I like this guy immensely. Great job turning a miscast into a super characterful space elf. Bravo sir.


    • Thanks mrsaturdays, he does have a good, reasonably unique look I think.

      Ignoring the miscast for the moment, that particular sculpt has given me all sorts of ideas since. I was thinking about Eldar symbiotically linked with local wildlife (horrible giant insects/nymphs primarily) and how that sort of a take on the Exodites is far preferable to me than the usual wood-elf-with-a-shuriken-catapult approach. L’Oreals outfit actually themes him relatively well with my space forest.

      It requires more consideration, but I could see myself putting together a small warband of these. Work has begun on a second in fact.


      • Sounds great. Very not-eldar, and would be quite creepy.


        • Wood Elves and by extension Exodites should be creepy and weird I think. More baby stealing, fairy tale, Pans Labyrinth style than say Vulcans or whatever.

          More in common with Fimir than High Elves now that I think about it. Appropriate though.


  9. Where is he in hasslefree’s website? Can’t find him.


  10. […] last year.  The foliage on Char’lee was painted to match the green areas on Stumpy and L’Oreal (the space elf model that is a primary influence on this project).  The fungus on the model is […]


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